Tuesday, June 20, 2006

The message

So, I hurt my back while helping my sister paint her new house. By wednesday I was imobilized. Laying in bed on an icepace gave me plenty of time to reflect on how much importance I place on my health. Too much importance. I idolize my health. Not a good thing to idolize since we will all loose our health somewhere along the way.

I am aware that these ailments, the knee, the back, the ongoing endometriosis issues, are sending me messages and these messages are teaching me how to let go of what I cannot keep. They are saying that there is nothing in this lifetime that cannot be taken away. We all live surrounded by this false appearance of security. The messages remind me to focus on what will last. The pain helps me to refocus on the quality of my relationships, on the health of my soul and the growth of my spiritual life.

There is a section in ‘The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People’ that asks the reader to think on their funeral. What would people say about you? What would your family and friends say about you had they the chance to stand up at your funeral service? What DEFINES you is what they will reference. Good way to stay centered on priority, right? I don’t want the only thing a friend or family member has to say is, ‘’Tracey was in good shape and she was healthy….she liked to exercise alot.” Heck, I don’t even want them to say I was a great artist. (Well, maybe a little….) Being an artist is great and that is part of who I am, but I don’t want to be defined by that or by my physical conditioning. My friend Jay said years ago, “Everyone has to have something to be crazy about.”

We are made to have a purpose, not to fritter our lives away on things that are passing and without merit. I am a big believer in balance in life. We all have a really hard time finding balance. Most of us are extreme with something in our lives. I have a long history of being extreme with exercise. I beginning to be thankful for the painful (literally) reminders that help me rebalance. Once I stop kicking and screaming I can hear the message.

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